Happy Birthday!!

My baby is 2 today!  Of course I have mixed feelings today.  I’m excited to celebrate her birthday and to watch her grow and mature (how in the world did she turn 2 already?), but I think of another woman today and I wonder.  Two years have passed, does she remember?  Does she think of her baby?  Does she wonder where or how she is?  I probably will never know the answers to these questions, but I will always wonder.  I would love to tell her how wonderful this daughter we share is.  The best I can do today is to write her a letter, knowing she will probably never see it.

So, since I haven’t posted in a while, there is a lot to update.  Obviously, Hadley is growing like a weed!  Since her first doctor’s visit (September 1^st), she has gained 4 pounds and grown 2 ½ inches.  That doesn’t sound like much but you can really tell – she’s gone from wearing 12-18 month clothes to 2Ts and moved up 1 shoe size.  She’s nowhere near the weight for a 2T, but she needs the length – thank goodness for adjustable waists because I can’t stand pants that are too short.   She doesn’t look like a baby anymore! 

Since my last post, she’s started speech and gymnastics.  Speech is going well – she’s making more sounds and saying lots of words.  I keep getting the “but you’re an SLP” comment.  I know that and I work with her at home but I wanted her to get “speech” from someone else.  I make other kids sit and work on their speech and language issues all day, everyday – I don’t want to be the one who makes her sit and work on it – I just want to be her Momma.  As a bonus, we got an SLP who has some experience with kids with clefts, so that’s nice.  Now, if she still needs speech when she starts school, well, she’s pretty much stuck with me.  Gymnastics is hilarious.  It’s a “Mommy and me” class, so it’s a workout for me too.  She loves it – she’s learned to do forward rolls, walk on a balance beam, and hang on the bar.  She absolutely loves trampoline time – she call it “jump, jump.”  She also loves to show off her “roll” to anyone who will watch – anytime, anywhere.  We just have to make sure she’s not doing it on tile floors or off of the changing table. 

We’ve had a few warm days lately and she has really enjoyed playing outside.  She loves to ride her turtle and drive her car.  I tell her she is a true Chinese driver – she just points her car and goes – the faster and crazier the ride the better!  She likes bubbles and drawing on her chalk board. 

Over Spring Break we took her back to see the International Adoption specialist and got an awesome report.  They were amazed with her development.  She was evaluated by speech and OT but they didn’t see any areas of concern (speech sounds are still an issue, but her language skills are fine and since she already gets speech, there wasn’t much they needed to do).  Dr. Taylor was thrilled with her growth and didn’t see any areas of concern developmentally or in attachment.  She actually released her – so that’s one less doctor we have to see.  We also saw the ENT for a follow-up on her tubes – they are still in and still open, so that was good news.  She had a hearing test too.  It showed a slight hearing loss, but we don’t know if it is accurate or not since we had to wake her up to do the test.  They are going to do an ABR the next time she is sedated to get a more accurate reading on her ability to hear.  It won’t surprise me if she has a slight hearing loss, but really, that’s not a big deal for us.  We will be seeing the plastic surgeon and the ophthalmologist in the next few weeks.  As far as I know, they are going to plan her eye surgery at these visits, so we’ll see what they say. 

Hadley’s birthday party is Saturday, so I’ll try to post some pictures in a few days.

Here are a few of her birthday pictures, enjoy!

Gotta love the smirk!

Dear Birthmother,

Thank you so much for the indescribable gift our daughter is.  I can never thank you enough for making the choice to give her life and to give her a chance.  I don’t know what your circumstances might have been or what lead you to make the choice to leave your baby, but I want you to know what a privileged it is to call her my daughter.  She is happy and so loved.  She has grown into a beautiful, spunky little girl.  I’m sure her medical needs were scary, but know that she is happy and healthy.  She is being taken care of by wonderful doctors and is doing great.  I wish you could see her, just once, and see how well she is doing and how happy she is.  Just look at her face!  Does she look like you -- with her shiny black hair and big beautiful eyes?  She radiates happiness and joy.  She is a bubbly ball of energy.  I hope that you have peace today, and somehow know that she’s ok – actually, she way better than ok.  She couldn’t be more loved.  She is our precious treasure, our daughter. 

Dear Hadley,

It’s your second birthday baby girl!  You’ve grown so much in the past 8 ½ months – I can’t believe it.  You are so busy and curious now.  You are rarely ever still or quiet.  You are learning to talk and saying new words almost every day.  Your vocabulary is growing by leaps and bounds.  I haven’t counted lately but you easily have over 200 words.  Your favorite words right now are “no” and “uggle” (snuggle – how sweet is that?), “uh-oh,” “eat,” and “more” but you talk all the time.  By the way, who taught you to argue already?  You love to watch the Backyardigans and Mickey Mouse Club House.  Your favorite toys are your stuffed animals – especially your bear and Goldie.   You love to read books and ride your zebra. You love to play with your dogs, Heidi and Bailey – now if we could just convince you that Heidi is not a “neigh” and that you can’t ride her!  You love warm days and playing outside – especially riding your turtle and blowing bubbles.  You love your Momma and Daddy – and we love you!  You love your grandparents – but Papaws are definitely the best.  You are the life of the party – always dancing around.  You love music and dance and going to gymnastics.  You are definitely your Momma’s girl – clothes and shoes are some of your favorite things – just wait ‘til you’re old enough for a purse!  You love to pick out your clothes and go through your shoes every chance you get.   You are wearing a size 2T now and are finally in a size 6 shoe.  You are learning to use the potty and are such a big girl.  You are beautiful and smart and our perfect daughter.  We love you – Happy Birthday baby!!

Love,

Momma