Merry Christmas!

As usual, I haven’t updated the blog in quite some time – somehow I never seem to have the time J  A certain little black haired beauty seems to keep me quite busy.  How is she these days?  Awesome.  She’s growing like a weed and continues to amaze us.   She is a hoot and keeps us on our toes (more on that in a minute).

Summer was great – our first summer break together.  We swam and played and had a great time.  Then school started again.  We are so fortunate this year to have Hadley in a small (think 5 kids total, 2 in school) in-home daycare.  She absolutely loves it.  We’ve had no tears and she talks about Mrs. Tina and her friends all the time.  We are so grateful that Tina is able to keep her this year.  It certainly makes it easier to leave her.  I have no doubt that she is well taken care of and happy – which was not the case last year.  We finally took her to the horse park this fall and she rode her first pony.  She loved it and wanted to take the pony home with her.  She looked so grown up riding a horse.  Jeff walked beside her, but she held on and sat still.  She talked with the big horses and was always ready to introduce herself – “Hi horsie, I name is Hadley.”  One horse talked back to her and she wasn’t really sure what to think about that.  She tried to get him to do it again (from the safety of her Daddy’s arms), but he wasn’t very cooperative.   

She had her eye surgery in October and has done great.  Her awesome surgeon was able to close the cleft in her lower eye lid without having to do any type of grafting.  He also did some work on her tear ducts and opened them up.  We still have a little more work to do on that, but nothing major.  We think her eye looks great and as it continues to heal it should be even less noticeable.  So – palate repair, check; eye lid repair, check; only the lip revision remains for now.  Of course we know that she will have to have her gum line fistula repaired later but we have a few years on that one.  So far, her palate appears to be long enough.  She is able to make all of the “back” sounds and we don’t hear much nasality that would indicate that her palate is too short.  We couldn’t have asked for her surgeries to go any better. 

We moved in November -- nothing like moving less than 2 weeks after your child has surgery -- and I was worried that she would be upset by the transition, but she handled it very well.  She woke up scared a few times the first couple of nights, but loves the “new house.”  She is especially fond of her room as she has tons of room to play and stars on her ceiling.  She thought it was pretty cool that Grandma and Mommy painted her room, just for her – thanks Mom!  She would check on the progress and say “Grandma (or sometimes Mamaw depending on her mood) painting Hadley’s room pink (or green, depending on the day).” 

This time last year, Hadley really didn’t say much.  She didn’t really start talking until after Christmas – and she hasn’t stopped.  Her vocabulary has grown by leaps and bounds.  Her speech is pretty good – really good when you consider that she heard only Chinese for 15 ½ months and had a cleft palate that wasn’t repaired until last November.  She talks constantly now – “quiet” is definitely not a word I will likely ever use to describe her!  She has something to say about everything and it really doesn’t matter if you answer her, she will just keep talking.  She’s happy talking to the dogs but still isn’t quite sure why they don’t answer or always do what she tells them to.  I’ve overheard her several times trying to get Heidi (our chocolate lab) to say “please” and “thank you.”   So far that’s not working too well.

She has asked for earrings (like Mommy) for months.  I promised her that she could get her ears pierced after her eye surgery.  So, we took her to the mall to get her ears pierced.  She was so excited about it.  Jeff tried to talk her out of it because he didn’t want to see her hurt, but she would not change her mind.  So the ears were pierced and she cried – until they pulled out the mirror and let her see.  There were no more tears and she was thrilled.  “Hadley got earrings!  Hadley got ears pierced!” over and over and over.  She has looked at them almost every day and shown them to everyone she knows!  I’m pretty sure we have a little diva in the making. 

It seems like she has grown a foot.  She’s getting size 3T clothes for Christmas (and it’s a good thing as the 2T pants are getting short).  Her waist is still tiny and I have to pull the waist in as far as they will go on most things to keep her pants up.  She’s nearly potty trained and loves to wear her Minnie Mouse panties.  She gets pretty irritated if she has to wear pull-ups for some reason.  She is ok with pull-ups for night time and if we are going somewhere, but don’t suggest she wear them at home! 

She is beyond excited about Christmas and loves the Christmas trees and decorations.   We managed to get 3 trees up this year – a minor miracle with the move.  She loves them all and tries to steal the ornaments.  She is a huge fan of the tree in our room that has all of the ornaments we’ve picked up on our travels.  We got her a set of Disney ornaments to add to the collection and she couldn’t have been happier.  She had definite ideas as to where each one should go – “right there!” – all at her level, of course.  So far, we’ve only broken one.  She is really intrigued by the stockings hanging over the fireplace.  She tried to claim them all, so we’ve labeled them and she will gladly tell anyone who will listen about the stockings and the “surprises” that they will soon contain.  She would really like for the surprises to show up soon!  Wrapping presents has been interesting – she has to know all about them and she was really disappointed that I wasn’t letting her “help” wrap any of hers.  After 4 presents for Mamaw and Daddy, she said, “Mommy, find a surprise for Hadley, please.”   There are plenty for her, of course, but I don’t think I want her to help wrap them.  She has stolen a few from under the tree – always exclaiming “I found a surprise!” only to be told that it’s not hers, please put it back.  She talks about Christmas and “Santa, Santa, Ho, Ho, Ho” a lot.  We’ve also been reading books about the true meaning of Christmas.  I know it’s a process and it will take a while before she really understands -- right now her version goes like this – “That a mommy and a daddy and a baby Jesus.  Him sleepin in a barn with a horsie and a donkey and a sheep and a goose.”  At least we’re headed in the right direction!  I’m pretty sure she will really enjoy Christmas this year – especially opening all of her “surprises.”

Some cute Hadley comments from the past couple of weeks:

 “Mommy, don’t touch anything – it nasty.  And stinky!  Dn’t touch it Mommy!” – in the bathroom at Kohl’s.

 “Mommy, come back here with Hadley’s candy cane!”

She has a fondness for chocolate – M&M’s (a.k.a. him and hims in Hadley land) and Hershey’s kisses are near the top of the list.  “Mommy, me need kisses – 2 kisses please”

“Mommy, I talkin to Bai (Bailey, our other dog).  I pettin her…. Get back here Bai….Mommy, her not wistenin.”

My parents sent her a Christmas card.  She was really excited about getting mail – she opened the envelope to find a card with picture of a kitten in a stocking.  Her response, “there a kitty in a stocking, that so silly!”  Then, “kitty, get out that stocking, that so silly!”  Apparently kittens do not count as surprises for stockings – and I’m pretty sure that’s not the reaction my Mom had in mind when she picked that card out. J

I found her digging in the pantry cabinet and asked what she was doing – “I getting Heidi bones.  Heidi want some bones.”  She then proceeded to steal one of the bones and run through the house with Heidi chasing her – cackling the whole time.   

We hope that you have a very Merry Christmas and enjoy the true meaning of the holiday.  We are so thankful that our baby girl is home safe and happy.  We are enjoying seeing the world through her eyes and enjoying the magic of Christmas! 

1 year – Happy Gotcha Day!!

July 26, 2010 – the day that changed our lives forever.  I can’t believe it’s been a year already.  This time last year we were in China, waiting anxiously to meet our baby (we didn’t meet her until about 3:15 in the afternoon).  I had no idea what to expect.  I was excited – we were FINALLY about to meet her! And scared – hello, someone was going to hand me a baby and expect ME to know what to do with her!  The actual meeting went amazingly well – no tears from Hadley, only a few from me.  It seemed so surreal – we walked into the room, saw her, someone checked our paperwork and passports, and she was ours.  I can’t imagine what was going on in her little head.  She had woken up in her crib at the orphanage.  Then someone got her up and dressed her in a new outfit and shoes, no doubt an unusual thing.  They then packed her up and drove her about 2 ½ hours into Changsha, brought her into the Civil Affairs office, took her picture, and handed her off to strangers – strangers who looked, smelled, and sounded so different.  She was scared to death, but she was so quiet and kept it all to herself.  She didn’t cry or try to pull away.  She just took it all in – and took a chance. Her only protest was that her bottle wasn’t hot enough.  It took us a while to figure that one out J but we finally got it right.  It didn’t take her long to start coming out of her shell.  The changes in her over the past year have been nothing short of amazing.  She’s grown over 4 inches taller and gained 8 pounds since we met her.  Her hair has grown out and is long enough for a cute little bob now.  She’s learned to walk, run, jump, climb stairs, and tumble.  She talks constantly!  Every day we understand more of what she is saying and she is using longer phrases all the time.  Her vocabulary has grown by leaps and bounds.  She is as smart as a tack – she already knows her colors and shapes.  Sometimes she’s too smart for her own good – she’s already figured out how to unlock the cabinets and “child safe” medicine bottles.  She knows far too much about my iphone.  She eats like a champ – there are very few things she doesn’t like – ground meat, watermelon, cheese cake, and cucumbers.  She loves fruits and vegetables – and chocolate.  She’s obsessed with Mickey Mouse – and our trip to Disney World didn’t help that!  Everyday she suggests her Mickey and Dumbo t-shirt when she gets dressed.  Thank goodness for DVR – “Mickey on” is one of her favorite requests.  She doesn’t understand why he isn’t available any time at her grandparents’ houses.  She loves swimming and playing outside.  She’s spoiled by my parents’ pool and asks frequently if we can go to “Papaw’s pool” and “go simmin.”  She has her grandparents wrapped around her little finger. She is a happy, bubbly little girl.  She claimed us long ago as her parents, but no she proudly announces “my Mommy, my Daddy.”  She gives the best hugs and kisses and best of all, last night she said “I love you!” on her own.  364 day of waiting and it was so worth it to hear those three words.  I can’t imagine life without her – she is the light of our lives.  Happy Gotcha Day baby – it has been the best year of my life and I can’t wait to celebrate many, many more of these days!!

Gotcha Day 2010

Some pictures from our trip to Disney World -- she hardly looks like the same child.

Happy Easter!

Happy Birthday!!

My baby is 2 today!  Of course I have mixed feelings today.  I’m excited to celebrate her birthday and to watch her grow and mature (how in the world did she turn 2 already?), but I think of another woman today and I wonder.  Two years have passed, does she remember?  Does she think of her baby?  Does she wonder where or how she is?  I probably will never know the answers to these questions, but I will always wonder.  I would love to tell her how wonderful this daughter we share is.  The best I can do today is to write her a letter, knowing she will probably never see it.

So, since I haven’t posted in a while, there is a lot to update.  Obviously, Hadley is growing like a weed!  Since her first doctor’s visit (September 1^st), she has gained 4 pounds and grown 2 ½ inches.  That doesn’t sound like much but you can really tell – she’s gone from wearing 12-18 month clothes to 2Ts and moved up 1 shoe size.  She’s nowhere near the weight for a 2T, but she needs the length – thank goodness for adjustable waists because I can’t stand pants that are too short.   She doesn’t look like a baby anymore! 

Since my last post, she’s started speech and gymnastics.  Speech is going well – she’s making more sounds and saying lots of words.  I keep getting the “but you’re an SLP” comment.  I know that and I work with her at home but I wanted her to get “speech” from someone else.  I make other kids sit and work on their speech and language issues all day, everyday – I don’t want to be the one who makes her sit and work on it – I just want to be her Momma.  As a bonus, we got an SLP who has some experience with kids with clefts, so that’s nice.  Now, if she still needs speech when she starts school, well, she’s pretty much stuck with me.  Gymnastics is hilarious.  It’s a “Mommy and me” class, so it’s a workout for me too.  She loves it – she’s learned to do forward rolls, walk on a balance beam, and hang on the bar.  She absolutely loves trampoline time – she call it “jump, jump.”  She also loves to show off her “roll” to anyone who will watch – anytime, anywhere.  We just have to make sure she’s not doing it on tile floors or off of the changing table. 

We’ve had a few warm days lately and she has really enjoyed playing outside.  She loves to ride her turtle and drive her car.  I tell her she is a true Chinese driver – she just points her car and goes – the faster and crazier the ride the better!  She likes bubbles and drawing on her chalk board. 

Over Spring Break we took her back to see the International Adoption specialist and got an awesome report.  They were amazed with her development.  She was evaluated by speech and OT but they didn’t see any areas of concern (speech sounds are still an issue, but her language skills are fine and since she already gets speech, there wasn’t much they needed to do).  Dr. Taylor was thrilled with her growth and didn’t see any areas of concern developmentally or in attachment.  She actually released her – so that’s one less doctor we have to see.  We also saw the ENT for a follow-up on her tubes – they are still in and still open, so that was good news.  She had a hearing test too.  It showed a slight hearing loss, but we don’t know if it is accurate or not since we had to wake her up to do the test.  They are going to do an ABR the next time she is sedated to get a more accurate reading on her ability to hear.  It won’t surprise me if she has a slight hearing loss, but really, that’s not a big deal for us.  We will be seeing the plastic surgeon and the ophthalmologist in the next few weeks.  As far as I know, they are going to plan her eye surgery at these visits, so we’ll see what they say. 

Hadley’s birthday party is Saturday, so I’ll try to post some pictures in a few days.

Here are a few of her birthday pictures, enjoy!

Gotta love the smirk!

Dear Birthmother,

Thank you so much for the indescribable gift our daughter is.  I can never thank you enough for making the choice to give her life and to give her a chance.  I don’t know what your circumstances might have been or what lead you to make the choice to leave your baby, but I want you to know what a privileged it is to call her my daughter.  She is happy and so loved.  She has grown into a beautiful, spunky little girl.  I’m sure her medical needs were scary, but know that she is happy and healthy.  She is being taken care of by wonderful doctors and is doing great.  I wish you could see her, just once, and see how well she is doing and how happy she is.  Just look at her face!  Does she look like you -- with her shiny black hair and big beautiful eyes?  She radiates happiness and joy.  She is a bubbly ball of energy.  I hope that you have peace today, and somehow know that she’s ok – actually, she way better than ok.  She couldn’t be more loved.  She is our precious treasure, our daughter. 

Dear Hadley,

It’s your second birthday baby girl!  You’ve grown so much in the past 8 ½ months – I can’t believe it.  You are so busy and curious now.  You are rarely ever still or quiet.  You are learning to talk and saying new words almost every day.  Your vocabulary is growing by leaps and bounds.  I haven’t counted lately but you easily have over 200 words.  Your favorite words right now are “no” and “uggle” (snuggle – how sweet is that?), “uh-oh,” “eat,” and “more” but you talk all the time.  By the way, who taught you to argue already?  You love to watch the Backyardigans and Mickey Mouse Club House.  Your favorite toys are your stuffed animals – especially your bear and Goldie.   You love to read books and ride your zebra. You love to play with your dogs, Heidi and Bailey – now if we could just convince you that Heidi is not a “neigh” and that you can’t ride her!  You love warm days and playing outside – especially riding your turtle and blowing bubbles.  You love your Momma and Daddy – and we love you!  You love your grandparents – but Papaws are definitely the best.  You are the life of the party – always dancing around.  You love music and dance and going to gymnastics.  You are definitely your Momma’s girl – clothes and shoes are some of your favorite things – just wait ‘til you’re old enough for a purse!  You love to pick out your clothes and go through your shoes every chance you get.   You are wearing a size 2T now and are finally in a size 6 shoe.  You are learning to use the potty and are such a big girl.  You are beautiful and smart and our perfect daughter.  We love you – Happy Birthday baby!!

Love,

Momma

6 Months, Really?

The calendar says it's been 6 months since we met Hadley -- how did that happen?  The 6 months between getting her referral and traveling to China took FOREVER, so it's hard to believe that it's been 6 months since she was placed in my arms.  It's certainly been an awesome 6 months.  The changes in Hadley are unbelievable.  She couldn't walk, she didn't talk, and she was so solemn.  Now she is happy and her laughter is infectious.  She rarely walks, she runs everywhere, and she jabbers constantly.  She's even started talking at daycare.  Her speech is coming along and she will repeat anything I ask her to say.  She's beginning to name things spontaneously.  Speech sounds are still an issue -- totally normal for a child with a cleft palate -- but she's making more sounds everyday and her syllable patterns and intonation are great.  I imagine that when she actually starts getting speech from someone besides me, she will make even more progress.  I've said before that we couldn't have gotten a better match.  She is the perfect fit for our family and she has totally taken to being part of our family.  Her adjustment and attachment have gone far better than we could have hoped.  There are still days when I look at her and think, "I can't believe you're really here."  But I really can't remember what life was like before she joined our family. 

People (crazy people apparently) are always asking if our lives have changed since she came home -- um, yeah!  My house isn't as clean as it once was.  There may be dust on the furniture and toys in the floor, but I'm ok with that -- ok, to a point.  We do pick up the toys every night and I try to keep the dust bunnies and fur balls under control.  Things get done when they get done, the schedule is long gone.  My friend told me that trying to clean house with little kids is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing -- I believe it.   I still make lists -- believe me I need them more now than ever -- and try to stay organized, but we go with the flow. 

One other awesome bit of news.  We went to see a geneticist yesterday.  Hadley's plastic surgeon wanted us to see one to rule out anything syndromic and make sure that there wasn't anything else we needed to be concerned about.  The geneticist was able to confirm that everything is exactly what we thought it was.  There are no syndromes involved -- just 2 midline clefts that happened to happen together.  We couldn't have gotten better news.  I didn't even have time to worry about it, thanks to a miscommunication, we didn't learn we had an appointment until Monday.  But it wouldn't have changed anything -- she would have still been Hadley and I would have still loved her just the same.  But I'm still praising the Lord that everything is good.

I would post pictures, but our computer has been attacked by a virus and I can't get to them.  Hopefully that will be taken care of soon.

1 Year Ago Tonight...

After attending a memorial service for a friend who had been murdered by a crazed co-worker, I came home to find an email from our agency -- saying there would be no more matches from the January list.  So I went to bed feeling depressed -- I just knew we would get a match from that list.  But it was Friday and the list had been released on Monday night, so I knew that the chances were pretty slim.  At about 12:30 the phone rang.  After I figured out what that noise was, I looked at the caller ID and I knew.  There was no other good reason our out of state agency would be calling in the middle of the night.  You see I had told them they could call anytime, day or night, if they locked a file for us.  Sure enough, they had locked a file for us.  A file for a baby girl that would become our daughter.  It was a crazy weekend -- getting a file reviewed by a doctor on a weekend, that's fun.  But we managed to have it reviewed by 2 doctors.  I had searched for a second doctor while I was waiting for Jeff to come home because I wasn't at all sure we would hear from our local IA doctor on a weekend.  I'm so thankful we had them both review the file.  That second doctor was so supportive and a "glass half full" kind of doctor.  Our local doctor was more of a "glass half empty" kind.  She was a bit freaked out by the eye lid cleft and was concerned that it indicated clefting of internal organs and all sorts of scary stuff.  She sent the file to a geneticist but didn't think we would hear back before the 48 hour deadline.  Now, if we hadn't contacted that second doctor, we would have been thinking that this wasn't our daughter.  What a mistake that would have been.  From the timing, we know that her file had been locked and unlocked twice.  Had our agency locked the file first, or even second, we wouldn't have contacted that second doctor (it would have been during the week).  Praise God that they locked it when they did!  We did hear back from the geneticist and he gave us the all clear, but we were prepared to submit paperwork requesting permission to adopt this little girl whether we heard from him or not.  I can't believe it's been a year -- it seems like yesterday and forever ago at the same time.  One year ago (in an hour or so) I saw my daughter's face for the first time.  Now hers is a face I know as well as my own.  And now, that little face smiles!  What a difference a year makes.

The first picture we saw

Hadley today

Our family

Christmas Recap -- a little late

Just before Christmas we had our final follow up with Hadley's surgeon.  Everything looked good -- no fistulas -- he cleared her to eat anything!  He also gave us the go ahead to try using valves in her cups and to try drinking from a straw!  We couldn't be more pleased with her palate repair.  We'll be seeing him again for her lip revision and her eye surgery.  We don't go back until April!! Hadley wasn't too sure why she had to sit with him.

I let her try feeding herself.  She's messy, but pretty smart.  Her macaroni kept getting away, so she dipped her spoon in mashed potatoes to make them stick.

Getting ready for Christmas -- she needed lots of festive shirts, here are just a couple.

Christmas at my parents.  This was her first gift opening adventure.  She wasn't sure what was going on -- it was a bit crazy.



Christmas at home.  Still not sure what it was all about.  She loved her stocking -- but wouldn't reach all the way to the bottom.  She wanted to read the books and watch the videos that were in there. 

This was as close as she came to "tearing into" her gifts.

Shoes!

 Slippers -- notice a trend here?

Christmas at Jeff's parents.  Aunt Debbie got her new cups -- with straws -- and she can do it!  We've been working on this and she can drink from these cups and now from a regular straw!!  Her suck is still not quite strong enough to use the valve in her cup, but she's getting there.  

A new phone

She's still so attached to her stuffed dog that she got while she was in the hospital.  Goldie even had to help her open presents.

Showing Papaw how to use my new laptop

Giving Daddy a shot...

The other good use for a "shot," lip gloss

I just love this shirt!

Even though she wasn't quite sure what it was all about, Hadley had a great Christmas.  She's been playing with her new toys and wearing her clothes since.  I'm sure next year she will be much more into opening presents.  She loved all of the decorations, but was OK when we took them down.